Remember in elementary school all the boys went to Jupiter to get more stupider? They are back. I’ve been seeing them everywhere.

I’m not dating to marry. I’m dating to experience a painful breakup that kickstarts my weight loss.

Sis you could be the whole table and he still gonna mess with a napkin.

Him: How do you know this dude?  Me: Oh him… Your inconsistency introduced us.

Sis, you’re crying over a dude with a 3rd grade reading level. He isn’t ignoring your text. He’s sounding it out.