We are so much more than our mistakes, missteps, and mishaps. Be gentle with yourself.
I often hear that I emanate beauty and grace in the face of adversity. I always loved that compliment because, damnit, it takes real work to hold your head up, strap up your high heels, and keep it pushing. There’s a subtle strength in the ability to push through and keep it moving with class and integrity.
For me, it’s always been second nature.
I don’t meet hostility with hostility; I meet it with questions.
I don’t meet stress with more stress; I meet it with solutions.
I don’t meet “you can’t” with defeat; I meet it with “watch this.”
Somewhere thereafter, alone in my room at night, I sulk, cry, scream, and yell. (Well, to be honest, the shower typically provokes my rawest emotions. There’s something about standing bare-naked, vulnerable, and alone with your thoughts that brings out the truth of your emotions. It’s truly the time when I’m at my weakest.)
That grace compliment is typically given once someone has seen you handle a tough circumstance in a way they admired or respected without knowing how hard it really was on you.
For me, the public demonstration of disrespect from a very public breakup caused me to feel a ton of shame, embarrassment, and every other word that basically means humiliation. During my mishap, I got to know shame well. Shame, according to Merriam-Webster, is a “painful emotion caused by consciousness of guilt, shortcoming, or impropriety.” Ultimately, you feel as though you weren’t enough.
The shame that comes from situations that try to break you can be enough to bury your self-confidence, deflate your self-image, and destroy your self-worth. At some point in your mistakes, mishaps, or missteps, you may feel as if you hit rock bottom. You know rock bottom – that nasty place in your mind where you convince yourself that life is so bad that there’s nothing you can do to handle life’s uncertainties. But honey, let me tell you – it’s in that moment of despair and devastation that actually brings the grace right out of you.
Have you ever noticed that when you try to say something in your deepest moments of despair that you can’t seem to speak? Are you familiar with the moments when you literally cannot find the words or energy to fight back?
You see, God’s grace can silence you.
In fact, my argument is that His grace silences you, reminds you, and then lifts you. When you are left alone to make a choice, to hand it over to God or drive yourself crazy, always give it to God. Hand it over to Him and let His unbelievable love do the work. Then, take God’s grace and, in turn, radiate grace in response to your personal storm.
- simple elegance or refinement of movement.
“she moved through the water with effortless grace”
- courteous goodwill.
Move with grace and grace alone. Let it lead you to a deeper understanding, increased dignity, and a greater sense of humility. Through every trial and tribulation, God orchestrates something beautiful out of your pain. He will bring healing by erasing the shame.
In my opinion, the only way to express love for the God who rescued me from my own negative narrative is to radiate the love He runs through me. When you are lifted from the false beliefs about yourself, you welcome the chance to walk in His light and move with grace. Through grace, you will find lessons of love, joy, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control, especially in your battles.
People want to know what keeps me walking with joy and dignity, and I’ll tell you one thing – it ain’t because of me; it’s because of God, the grace of God.
“Grace means that all of your mistakes now serve a purpose, instead of serving shame.” – Mike Rusch
So, like I said, I’m still here, and it’s by the grace of God. Be gentle with yourself, Young Queen. Meet your mistakes with grace, God’s undeniable grace.